Madonna’s Baby Boy Likes Him Some Gin

Madonna posted a New Year’s picture of her 13-year old hoisting a bottle of gin with the caption: The party has just begun! Bring it 2014! Now she’s being judged. She wants you to stop judging her as a mom. Also, stop judging 55-year olds who say ‘bring it’. Stop judging skeletor looking women who buy babies from the Sudan to supplement their own kids from multiple fathers. Stop judging pop music and the mystical religion of Kabbalah and older women who likes to mount young Moroccan male dancers while calling them Fatima. Just stop it.

Calm down and get a sense of humor! Don’t start the year off with judgement!” — Madonna on Instagram

What did I tell you. Don’t judge the year, or how it starts, or the use of exclamation points where they’re not warranted. Leave Madonna and her family alone and you won’t get hurt. That bandana probably means her kid is queer. Shit, I just judged Madonna’s family. I’m going to need some time with this, Madge.

Photo Credit: Madonna/Instagram