Jessica Simpson Is A Natural Beauty

A lot of people are patting Jessica Simpson on the back for Tweeting this picture from her “date night” last night, because she’s apparently not wearing makeup, and that’s good enough to get a girl the Purple Heart these days. I don’t see what the big deal is, though, because she looks like she’s got a bad case of the meat sweats or she’s choking on a handful of Sour Patch Kids. Either way, her husband was probably thinking that it wouldn’t kill her to go freshen up in the bathroom, before he looked down at the pictures of Jessica from Dukes of Hazzard that he keeps on his phone.