Aaron Hernandez Had a Killer Offseason

Aaron Hernandez is a pretty talented dude. Solid football player for the Patriots. Like many guys in the NFL, when he has a little down time from the season, he enjoys hanging out with thugs, late night strip clubs, and brandishing weapons. It was that or golf and golf is fucking boring. Hernandez is about to be arrested because one of his running buddies was found shot in the back of the head on a jogging path not far from his home in the middle of the night on Monday. This after hanging out with Hernandez and a bunch of his gentlemanly friends that evening. Looks like Hernandez may not have been the trigger man, but when the police came to investigate, Hernandez promptly tore apart all of his home’s video surveillance equipment and then smashed his cellphone. Like he was putting on a demonstration of how to look extremely fucking guilty. Now, we could all lament the violence and thuggery surrounding the NFL and its players, or we could drink beer and watch the greatest sport on earth.