Bella Bella Bella

You gotta send props to Bella Thorne – she’s taken a modicum (tee-hee) of talent and beauty far beyond any other chiquita, based solely on the ability to show / not some skin.

What is her skill-set exactly? Yeah we know, model, influencer, director, blah-blah-blah. Her IMDb credits are as spotty as a young Latino actor tired of playing Gang Thug #3. The temptation is to compare her to Kylie or Nicki or some other young woman who’s really good at posing in a well-lit area, but most of her comparable hunnies would excel in any business venture bc hotness.

Thorne’s skill is leveraging her fame to land movie roles, direct porn, and any other Hollywood job that’s not just selling crap on the Gram. We can’t think of any reason anyone would hire her to do anything other than taking off her clothes (maybe putting them back on?), other than bc she’s built up a following by taking off her clothes.

Miley can sing (apparently), JLo can act (allegedly), and various soccer players can kick a ball around the field / pitch – what specifically can Thorne’s do when there’s no camera around? Okay, there’s THAT, but by now Bella would have those moments picted and broadcast if she thought it would get her an Oscar nomination.

In America, talent and training and patience are not needed when you’re a greasy ginger with nice bs – and God Bless America.