Jessica Biel Finally Gets A Job

Jessica Biel has a lot in common with an expired coupon. At one point it did work, but after a certain date it became useless. If you weren’t aware, there’s a war going on that no man is safe from. Corporations are fighting for your attention, and in a bid to win the streaming battle, they’re constantly recruiting low-tier talent currently in the final spin cycle of their career. Biel has gone from showing her face on the big screen to spending the finale of her days on a new Facebook series entitled Limetown. And after reading the summary of the series, it sounds like it’s shaping up to be a Walmart Great Value version of the Sharp Objects show.

Facebook Watch adding more star power to its video platform. The social media giant has picked up 10-episodes of “Limetown,” a new series starring Jessica Biel, who will also executive produce through her Iron Ocean Productions banner alongside Michelle Purple.

Based the podcast of the same name, “Limetown” follows Lia Haddock, a journalist for American Public Radio (APR), as she unravels the mystery behind the disappearance of over 300 people at a neuroscience research facility in Tennessee.

I’d say that Biel landing a deal with Facebook is proof that her legacy is tarnished, but then that would require me to admit that she was ever important in the first place. And acknowledgement in Hollywood follows the same rules as bringing personal snacks from home to a Kindergarten classroom. If you don’t have enough to share with everyone, don’t bring any at all. Tara Reid would be next in line asking for accolades, completely ignoring the fact that the best roles she gets now are in directly-to-dollar store DVD movies.