Chris Pratt’s Prayers Heal Heart Attacks

Chris Pratt should probably go back to being the same Pratt on the couch of Parks and Recreation. Or at the very least keep his mouth closed when it comes to wishing Kevin Smith the best after a heart attack. A fat Pratt was a man with broken legs that minded his own affairs. But that all changed after Chris became Hollywood. Faux sympathy is standard when you become a superstar and can finally sit at the cool kids’ table. A gym membership, a lead role in Guardians of the Galaxy, and a lion’s share of revenue generated by a Jurassic Park reboot can completely change a person’s life. In a move that could only be inspired by ice queen Sarah Jessica Parker, Chris tweeted and pleaded for people to pray for Kevin Smith until he was feeling better.

Praying for you. I will continue to. You inspired me with Clerks when I was a senior HS. I’m tagging my Lb/rb football coach who showed me the movie cause he believed in me and knew I’d be inspired. @hodge1916 🙏♥🙏 https://t.co/syB7BiQaoY

— chris pratt (@prattprattpratt) February 26, 2018

Kevin we don’t know each other too good but I have loved you since Clerks and I’m praying my ass off for you cause I believe in the healing power of prayer. Can you please pray with me people!? 🙏♥ https://t.co/syB7BiQaoY

— chris pratt (@prattprattpratt) February 26, 2018

Thoughts and prayers are the adult equivalent of a mother kissing a kid’s boo boo to make them feel better. We’re all just waiting for society and everyone on social media to grow up. Prayer works 100% of the time when you’re a dense individual. Real life isn’t a Disney movie. Thoughts and prayer sentiments are even worse when the relationship of the well-wisher and the afflicted party are strangers. It’s almost a more disingenuous than the same talent agent that tells Megan Fox she gets gigs because of her talent.

Photo Credit: Chris Pratt’s Ex-Wife Anna Faris from Backgrid USA