Taylor Swift Continues Trademark Takeover of the World

Taylor Swift continues to trademark inane child-like lyrics from her hit songs to the benefit of moving licensed merchandise with the phrases. It makes no sense unless your fifteen and your parents think buying you useless crap will make you hate them less. So, half of American girls, and about a quarter of the rest of the world. Nobody earns a 9-figure paycheck by accident.

Swift’s latest trademark binge, to stop infringement of anything related to her, her music, her brand, her look, her style, and her pancake white shapeless ass includes registering the term “Big Reputation” as a commercial mark. The words were formed as if by encephalitic meerkats for the purposes of her latest song, End Game, very much like the last:

Big reputation, big reputation
Ooh you and me we got big reputations, ah
And you heard about me, ooh
I got some big enemies

Big reputation, big reputation
Ooh you and me would be a big conversation, ah
And I heard about you, ooh
You like the bad ones too

This seems somewhat akin to catching the uttering of a Tourette’s Syndrome patient with limited educational background and deigning to tell the world these random connections of words belong only to you. Of course, kids on the suburban street corner can still use the term “big reputation”, but if you try to move a silk-screened t-shirt, black helicopters will descend upon you and you’ll be suffocated with a pair of musty granny panties until you breathe no more.

In these situations of commercial avarice, you’re supposed to remind to hate the game, not the player. But that’s exceedingly difficult with the mug of Taylor Swift in bright red lipstick beaming at you like a Body Snatchers plant here on earth. Perhaps sexist, but we prefer our predatory barons to be fat old men in three-piece suits smoking cigars and killing hookers. This is all wrong. Like the way people pretend Switzerland is a nice place. Somebody needs to pull back the curtain.

Photo Credit: Pacific Coast News