Aaron Rodgers Checking Out Danica Patrick’s Pipes

Aaron Rodgers dumping Olivia Munn to date Danica Patrick sounds dumb every time anyone is forced to say the sentence aloud. Of course Rodgers decided to distance himself from Olivia to focus on football but look where that has got him. Just another Packer trying to pick up the pieces in the offseason while picking up an eternally out of season woman. Danica has already started her decline and it’s obvious Rodgers’ wants to accelerate his. It won’t be long before the CTE sets in forcing him to go full Fargo and feed his entire family, Chocolate Labrador included, into a wood chipper on a silent Wisconsin night.

Aaron Rodgers and Danica Patrick seem to be rounding out the first lap of their rumored romance — ’cause now they’re dining together out in the open.The Packers QB and NASCAR driver were spotted grabbing a bite Saturday night at The Mission Mexican restaurant in Scottsdale, Arizona.

The universe suggests that older men should date younger women for a reason. Danica is demanding to have kids and live the mundane life most of the middle-class has grown accustom to. What was the point of amassing millions of dollars just to live in a log cabin on the edge of Lake Michigan? At 34-years-old risking permanent paralysis after every snap Aaron should be sleeping with as many models as possible instead of dealing with diapers and possible play dates for the week. Or maybe Rodgers really does enjoy men and it’s not a rumor. Patrick’s face leans a little more on the stiff side of the spectrum.
Photo Credit: Getty Images / Pacific Coast News