Elliot Spitzer Liked His Leash Taut and His Bottom Stuffed

We live in hard times, when a man can’t trust his top price Russian escort to keep his kinky secrets. That may be unduly tough on Russians. Most whores can’t be trusted. Neither can the politicians they serve at The Plaza.

Former New York Governor Elliot Spitzer’s most recent isexual indiscretions involves a sex worker who threatened to expose his fetish play if not for the gift of $400,000 in American cash. $40,000, maybe she walks away with an envelope full of cash, but four-hundred large sent Spitzer to the authorities, and Svetlana Travis Zakharova busted for blackmail. The charges against Zakharova were later reduced to a made-up misdemeanor plea and three month sentence.

(Zakharova is no amateur ho. She’s a $5,000 per evening BDSM specialist, who detailed her journey to becoming a high priced N.Y. call girl in an article on Medium.)

Spitzer used his connections to get the dirty details of the Plaza whoring squelched from any and all police and prosecutorial reports. Zakharova found a way to publicize Spitzer’s dark sex play secrets with a post-verdict motion before the court. The filing contained all kinds of allegations of mistreatment and miscarriage of justice due to Spitzer being friends with everybody important in New York City. Also, Zakharova wanted her confiscated iPad back. Asserting that:

“Spitzer was paying young girls to insert sex toys into his anal cavity and walk him around the floor on all fours with a leash is conduct that he made a conscious choice to engage in.”

Zakharova’s court filing went on to explain how she has a First Amendment right to publicly express how much Spitzer loves a big dildo crammed in his rectum. The subtle irony being largely that she doesn’t, but now she has. Pretty slick move. hell hath no fury like a prostitute reverse jacked. 

A spokesperson for Spitzer immediately disclaimed the naughty dog play as the claims of a convicted extortionist. That’s technically true, though not a real defense from a man who hires Russian pros up to his hotel room.

What can be learned largely from this sordid tale is that it largely sucks to be famous. Even when you don’t harass the gals in the typing pool and instead lay out money for a girl to walk you around on a dog leash, you’re probably getting into some kind of public trouble. Your local plumber doesn’t have his down low play splashed on the cover of The Post. Though he does have to use bus terminal bathrooms as opposed to plush hotel suites.

As for overly intelligent Russian whores, you’d have a better chance drinking that Slobodan at the Hague courtroom cocktail.

_{Photo credit: Getty Images}