Minaj Bod Mod Hodgepodge

Celebrity asses are really having to one-up each other in the race to grab headlines, and it looks like Nicki Minaj isn’t ready to throw in the towel, even though she’s going up against the likes of botched Armenian centaur Kim Kardashian. Minaj has made a living out of clapping her ass cheek implants together to the hypothetical delight of men everywhere – though more femininity and sex appeal could be found in a water buffalo in drag – but the singer’s latest Instagram look really has people talking. About how scary and botched she looks. 

Minaj refers to this as her “Barbie” look, which is news to anyone unaware of the lastest line of tyrannosaurus rex Barbies coinciding with the Jurassic World sequel. Femininity has taken a turn for the Tennessee Valley Fair sideshow lately, and Minaj keeps upping the ante year after year to the delight of curious onlookers. Her hips in this picture extend beyond her shoulders, and the whole thing just feels like something that we should be pitying on a TLC special. Besides the tits. Those are still pretty great. Minaj isn’t as bad as Tara Reid, obviously, but if you saw Minaj clomping towards you at da club, would you throw up on your shirt, or experience unbridled fits of sexual arousal? Honest question.

I had to know what selfless oat the flesh artists known as plastic surgeons take when stepping out onto the frontlines of defying God and nature, so here’s just a snippet of the sanctified ancient text known as the Code of Ethics of the American Society of Plastic Surgeons:

The principal objective of the medical profession is to render services to humanity with full respect for human dignity. Physicians should merit the confidence of patients entrusted to their care, rendering to each a full measure of service and devotion.

Yeah. Check out the abundance of human dignity in the gallery below.

^{Photo Credit: Instagram}