Kim Kardashian Says She Has, Like, Body Dysmorphia

The ladies of the Jenndashian brothel are revelatory statement Pez dispensers as they try to salvage a show people used to watch. On the most recent episode of No One’s Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Kim continues to try to make her fake Paris robbery a thing while also admitting that she struggles with accepting her gross fat body and, that she used to stage her paparazzi appearances. Just admit that you need a veiny strap-on to please your husband and we’ll pretty much have all our bases covered. On blending in: 

Ever since Paris I just go through this worst-case scenario mode in my head…. It hit me that all of these people in the airport are going to see 17 or 18 girls with our Chanel and Louis Vuitton bags.

On not really knowing what body dysmorphia is:

You take pictures and people just body shame you. It’s like literally giving me body dysmorphia.

Her body is, like, literally dysmorphic, so I guess that makes sense. On making the bed in which she currently lies:

It’s just that I don’t want it to be said that ‘Kim was here.’ I just don’t want to be in the mix the way that I used to. How desperate I was going to every restaurant…. Wanting to be seen. I’d be like, ‘Oh, Katsuya? I know the paparazzi’s there.’ 

Up until now, Kardashian has been able to have her cake and eat it too. And then have fifty more cakes. Injected into her ass cheeks. But by lamenting her celebrity status in front of cameras for a show aired on national television, Kim is also bravely admitting that she struggles with a learning disability. Paris Hilton may come from the same class of prostitutes, but at least she never had delusions of abandoning the profession in hopes of a better life. She knows this is the best she’ll ever have it. Kardashian is in too deep, and trying to create distance with the public on her own reality show is, like, moronic.

^{Photo Credit: E!}