Kendall Jenner Cries While Finally Addressing Pepsi Controversy

More of Kendall talking about the Pepsi commercial pic.twitter.com/fEViJr9HjK

— A.B. (@AlannaBennett) October 2, 2017

The only Jenndashian to give humanoid looks a go, Kendall Jenner, finally addressed her attempts at assuaging strained police and civilian relations with a can of Pepsi during last night’s episode of Keeping Up With The Kardashians. Kendall’s chat with a porn star about the incident in the new clip occurred three weeks after the Pepsi ad originally aired back in April. She also breaks down in tears privately during a KUWTK confessional. Black lives matter. Police lives matter. But above all else, Kendall’s life matters.

For those who don’t remember, the Pepsi ad spot follows Jenner and the cast of Rent as they chant in the streets for whatever in the face of some dashing police officers. Just when it seems like their breakdancing isn’t solving world peace, Kendall gets the idea to eye pork an officer while offering him a Pepsi. After just one sip he’s like, wow. Now I have even more energy to beat people. 

The masses were immune to the subtlety, and Pepsi quickly pulled the ad. Kendall has remained quiet, until now. If you can decipher her takeaway from the incident we’d all appreciate it:

I would never purposely hurt someone, ever. I would, obviously— if I knew this was gonna be the outcome, I would have never done something like this. But you don’t know when you’re in the moment, and like, it was the most … like, it was … like, it was so … like, I just felt so f**king stupid. 

The fact that I would offend other people or hurt other people was definitely not my intent and that’s what got me the most, is that I would ever make anyone else upset.

She also explains the rich history behind the brand and why shilling for Pepsi was an opportunity like no other:

When I first got this offer … I mean, it’s a huge company. The people I was following were so iconic and amazing. Michael Jackson has done it, Britney Spears has done it, Beyoncé has done it, Pink. The list goes on. So to get something like that was just … It was so exciting.

Pink should pay for that kind of publicity. If she’s even still alive. The most invaluable hot tip to waft off the Jenndashian dump heap is: Capitalize on every damn thing. Kendall turned a sloppy-not-really-apology into a marketing opportunity for Keeping Up With The Kardashians. A family willing to stage a mass birthing isn’t above coursing out controversy months after it originally happened. Playing our appetite for celebrity blunders like a fiddle. This season of Keeping Up With The Kardashians is brought to you by embryos and Pepsi.    

^{Photo Credit: E! News, Pepsi}