Chelsea Handler Didn’t Do So Well at Netflix

Chelsea Handler announced she will not be taping another season of her show, some variation of the name Chelsea, for Netflix. Handler issued a statement insisting that her leave is prompted by her desire to travel the nation and visit places she doesn’t know about, to educate herself on the country’s political divide. Or the celebrity version of the politician claiming they want to spend more time with their family after pollsters inform them they have no shot at another election win. Only Handler has no family.

Handler’s Netflix show came in with tremendous fanfare and a shit ton of cash. Also, an almost two year hiatus of topless selfies while Handler geared up for a brand new show that when it appeared, was almost exactly like her last show. That first season met with mixed reviews and a large amount of disinterest. Nobody ever bothered to ask if Handler was talented enough to carry a show outside of her laugh track and tautly scripted Kardashian yuck fest on E!. Netflix merely wanted a female ballbuster to run a show they could label controversial. 

Earlier this year, Handler and Netflix once again announced she’d be re-retooling the show’s second season. Various lipstick ideas for the pig. And airing on Friday evenings once a week in the manner of Real Time with Bill Maher on HBO. That failed too. There’s no other way to read Handler’s quitting to conduct her Sullivan’s Travels across America as Netflix politely offering her the chance to save face before a cancellation notice and firing.

If there’s one thing this country need now to heal, it’s a raunchy spinster with limited insight traveling the highways and byways of previously denounced flyover states to listen and learn. Handler’s journey is in conjunction with the progressive feminist Emily’s List and she’ll basically be visiting college campuses to promote candidates supporting women’s causes. That agenda is to healing the political divide in this nation as Chelsea Handler is to comedy. Trump jokes to the gals at Bennington. How can this not be the salve America needs?

Chelsea Handler got her break at E! the old fashioned way. In desperation someday she’ll spin those hummers on the network President as retroactively nonconsensual to smudge up her original feminist sin. Hollywood is a tough town. Everybody is covering for something. Good luck on your next great adventure, Chelsea. Who knows where circling the bowl will take you.

See her topless pics here