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August 8, 2017 | crap around the web | Elliot Wolf | 0 Comments
Age is nothing but a number. But so is a prison sentence. I’ll take the least amount of both whenever possible. Is anyone starting to see a Lolita trend in this generation? MILF teachers are boosting grades and the male juvenile erection rate. It has to be life’s way of counter balancing all of the pedophilic elderly sugar daddies that have been running rampant for eons. Take notes. The fight for equality in feminism is always fought best without a shirt on. If men can be perverts, so can women. But 73-year-old Richard Basaraba who has been banned from Volusia County Beaches is looking to up the score.
Basaraba was reported to the police, according to the News-Journal, by a mother and her 16-year-old daughter, to whom he’d given one of his cards reading “Ask me about your monthly allowance.” He likes to wear a T-shirt with a photo of a young girl sitting on the knee of an older man, reading “ACCEPTING APPLICATION 4A SUGAR BABY,” which he describes as a “conversation starter” because it helps him get likes on Facebook.
It’s perfectly fine to offer to pay a woman’s rent in exchange for sexual favors. It’s like the lite version of marriage. No paperwork. And when you’re tired of her loose labia, she doesn’t leave with half. Where you run into problems is when you offer to pay for someone’s rent that hasn’t graduated high school yet. That’s when a phone call to Chris Hansen needs to be made.
On a recent beach walk, he found a bra pad, which he keeps in a basket on a living room shelf. “It gave me an excuse to talk to women,” Basaraba said.“I would go up to a group of women of all ages — 20s, 30s, 40s, 50s — (and say), ‘Honey, I’m looking for my Cinderella. I did not find a glass slipper on the beach but I did find this.’”He hasn’t been arrested, but he threw away his business cards and everything.
When a 73-year-old man calls a 16-year-old the cutest one at the beach, they need to be blood-related. Anything else should land the guy on a registry. A beach banning for this guy was pretty light given the circumstances. His only defense would be amnesia made him forget the age of consent. And if that’s the case, he needs to be in a home wearing a diaper. Not strolling beaches looking for kids still wearing diapers.
Photo Credit: Getty