Must Find Somebody to Blame in Chris Berman’s Wife’s Fatal Crash

There are certain downsides to being a celebrity. Lack of privacy. Everything else is pretty amazing. Like the desperate attempt of law enforcement to cover for you and your family members’ missteps. Especially if you’re a beloved public figure.

Back in May, Chris Berman’s 67-year old wife Katherine Berman rammed her Lexus into the rear of an SUV driven by an 87-year old man returning from a visit to his wife’s grave. Good news bad news. He got to be with his wife again after striking a utility pole and being thrown from his vehicle. Berman’s Lexus careened over the side of the Connecticut road and rolled into water. She died from a combo of the trauma and drowning. 

The accident was ruled an accident. Which reminds that it’s time to stop calling car accidents accidents when there is so often underlying debilitating conditions. Booze comes to mind. Three months hence the police have yet to release toxicology reports. That’s an overtly odd length of time. While awaiting the inevitable, the state police and Liquor Control launched an investigation into the Good News Cafe in Hartford in relation to serving alcohol to one, Katherine Berman.

The whole scapegoat plan was working according to plan until the owner of the Good News Cafe produced electronic records to prove that her establishment was in fact closed for business on the day of Berman’s car crash. Also, for the record, fuck you for blaming any restaurant for your celebrity wife drinking and driving and smashing into old guys on the road. Bruce Jenner was easing into serious hormonal imbalances when he killed his old person on the road. Nobody went looking to blame the testosterone blocker manufacturers.

This entire case reeks of sweeping under the rug coverup. Nobody contests a standard celebrity pass for cocaine possession, reasonably not sick statutory rape, and tax evasion. But vehicular manslaughter can’t be secretly added to the list of things your Michael Clayton fix-it guy gets to personally null and void. People are dying here. The least the rich and connected people should be doing is paying for expensive defense attorneys. 

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