Christina El Moussa Wants Her Money

It’s not easy being a divorced bleach blonde 34-year old in Orange County. Not like the ten thousand others of your ilk remarrying business men looking for trophy wives and a blow job on the major holidays and every third Tuesday. You don’t even really need the money, you simply like to know it’s there. It’s the security that comes with a sought after vagina. 401(k)’s are for everybody else.

Christina El Moussa has filed papers seeking alimony from her sad sack Flip or Flop ex-husband, Tarek El Moussa. The one who cried and grabbed a gun and ran into the woods when he found out his wife was doinking Gary the Contractor from the show. This would be alimony on top of a split of the marital assets and any child support, though both have filed for joint custody of the children.

It begs the question, why does hot chick with fap worthy bikini selfies and seven figures in career earnings in her early 30’s need a guy with essentially the same pedigree to fund her enhanced lifestyle? That’s not a question so much as a tirade against alimony.

The concept of alimony made sense in that window of time when divorce became super easy and popular and womenfolk were still largely spending their career years as homemakers, bereft of an independent revenue stream. Men could take off with the younger, better version in the guise of their secretaries and wife and moms with no career skills would be left high and dry. It happened. Men were forced to pay. It’s where all those alimony jokes came from in the 60’s and 70’s. 

Now women have their own careers. Not all, but many. Including Christina El Moussa who partnered 50-50 with her jelly legged husband on a TLC show and related house flipping and real estate seminars. They’re equally as accomplished and capable of doing whatever the hell it is they really do. Smashing a particle board wall for a camera and looking fit. There’s child support for anything the kids need. What’s the purpose of alimony other than to punish?

As a reminder, Tarek keeps a gun in a safe and he’s highly emotionally unstable. Be careful what you wish for through legal filings. Those artificial features can’t possibly cost that much to maintain.

Photo Credit: Splash News

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