Michelle Monaghan Still Intact

Michelle Monaghan was never supposed to be a thing. And she pretty much isn’t. But the world is powerless to an actress over forty who doesn’t register as emotionally exhausted Silly Putty. The forty-one-year-old Monaghan fits the bill for now. Her disparate Instagram posting style shows her age. A dream catcher, font-plagued motivational quotes, and age-inappropriate selfies say “Hello world, I was born before the floppy disk.” But Monaghan’s body hasn’t let her down. Her new Instagram picture proves to the world that her arms can support her body weight. A feather in her cap considering the same can’t be said for some Americans’ legs. 

The former off-brand Sandra Bullock found her time in the limelight thanks to a smattering of supporting roles in high-profile flicks, as well as her Hulu series The Path. I always thought the nose would hold Monaghan back. Good for her. She’ll be teaming up with Tom Cruise once again for the upcoming Mission Impossible: Holy Shit Who Cares. Monaghan is famous enough for the Internet to give a shit about her shameless Insta posts. A true measure of a celebrity’s clout.    

The #tbt in the caption, “Cartwheeling into the weekend… It’s almost here! #tbt,” could mean that trickery is afoot. Throwback to before or after you were ransacked by human embryos? But Monaghan has looked fuckable in two Instagram pictures since May, so we’re probably in the clear. She kept up a hot bod and showed her tits on True Detective The Path. Bullock kept clothed but had a highly-publicized divorce with a neo-Nazi. Both compelling career paths. But I’ll take Monaghan. 

_{Photo Credit: Instagram}