Julio Jones Is Real Life Rose From Titanic

When I was growing up, social groups were separated like factions in the movie Divergent. Our personal strengths and weaknesses dictated who we grouped with. You were always able to see that the athletes in a class weren’t the same as the kids seeking STEM related careers after graduation. In fact, the athletes were usually the remedial kids. They would randomly yell as if they had Tourette’s and were unnaturally strong. Someone figured out if you give them a ball to focus that energy on, one day they too can have a seven figure salary. But just as celebrities have shown us before, having a lot of money doesn’t mean you’re an intellectual. Cue Julio Jones who is two for two in dumb ideas.

The superstar of the Atlanta Falcons lost his diamond earring while jet skiing. That was when he apparently hit a boat wake and was tossed into the water.  He came back up, but his earring, worth more than $100,000 didn’t. He suspects that it’s now somewhere at the bottom of the lake – some 65 feet below.

Would a construction worker bring fine white garments to a site and expect to not get dirty? So why bring earrings the price of a small house with you jet skiing? Are you into impressing mermaids? I bet her bottom half smells like fish. Instead of chalking this up as a lesson learned, and salvage his reputation. Julio paid $500 to a team of salvage divers to look for an earring worth $100,000. I’m pretty sure leaving said earrings in your vehicle or place of residence is free. It’s no surprise that the divers didn’t find the earrings. Imagine being paid $500 to look for something $100,000 from someone making millions of dollars. That’s an equation to never get your earring back even if a diver did find it. Sit quietly and enjoy your slice of stupidity pie Julio.