Beckham Loves Beer

Nothing truly says I haven’t accomplished anything like dating sub par singing stars on YouTube looking for a come up. But it’s almost fitting when you’re only famous for being a soccer star’s seed that wasn’t swallowed. In true Hollywood fuckboy form Brooklyn Beckham is now buying Madison Beer clothes and other gifts in an attempt to confirm the fling. The Beckham offspring underlings just can’t seem to get a foothold on legitimate fame. Another case of living in your parent’s shadow. It’s no doubt that if David Beckham had farted during dinner it would be more interesting than the entirety his son’s relationship. 

Brooklyn, who formerly dated Chloe Grace Moretz, is said to be loved up with the singer after seeing each other for a few weeks, with the couple’s outing coming shortly after news of their union surfaced. 

But it’s not about what you do, it’s about how you look. And Madison Beer looks like a good time. Justin Bieber signed her, but she sounds instantaneously better when her YouTube music videos are muted. That debut album still hasn’t come years later, but she has managed to release plenty of pics of her tits and ass. Most of them while still jailbait. What working class individual needs more lyrics from the oppressed elite swearing they have the same struggle. Have you ever had to decide between eating for the week or paying a lady for love because you’ve been deprived of both for so long? I don’t want to hear you pretend like these are options for you. I am unbreakable. Not you Madison.

_{Photo Credit: Splash News}