Danielle Bregoli Taking Her Act on the Road

Danielle Bregoli continues to insist she’s fourteen, though the doctor who did her breast implants won’t cop to anything under sixteen. Bulgarian surgery rules.

The sinister hood rat from Florida of all places is taking her shtick on the road in what is being billed as a national tour. So far, there are two cities booked, so national as in what Sprint used to refer to as their nationwide network before the class-action suits. You’re good in Columbus and Topeka. Still, venues agreeing to have this little pimp in their house says something about the state of modern day entertainment. Also, the lack of enforcement of child labor laws.

Here’s what you can expect to see if you’re not shy about the entire world laughing at how you spent your last fifty bucks:

Bregoli lip-synching her favorite rap songs

A live Q&A for everything you ever wanted to know about the Cash Me Ousside girl

Bregoli pulling her fiery put downs on audience members invited on stage

It’s being sold as an entertainment act though it sounds eerily like how we squeeze information out of ISIS captures in the field of battle. If you ask to see her tits you can be arrested for felony statutory assault. As a final straw, no alcohol will be served. Where does the line form?

This is the opening gambit in what Bregoli’s reps have planned for her to milk money out of her fifteen minutes of fame. TMZ claims she stands to make upwards of fifty grand per event, though assume that’s dramatically inflated and ten grand is the likely net. Still, beats what most kids are pulling down in eighth grade.

In general, you hate to see kids exploited. Though when you’re quite positive they’re entire life’s potential is peaking at fourteen, you do need to make some kind of move.