Rupert Sanders Suffers Oral For His Art

Rupert Sanders regrets going down on Kristen Stewart five years. Or at least he regretted the scandal before getting to conveniently mention it while pushing his new turd Ghost in the Shell. Sanders and Stewart met when he directed her in Snow White and the Huntsman, and shortly after they were photographed by the paps exploring each other’s orifices in a car. She was dating her Twilight co-star and first lipstick lesbian lover Robert Pattinson. He was married to fashion model, Liberty Ross. 

You never know what’s coming in life. Around every corner there’s something unexpected, and that’s life. You just have to brush yourself off and continue moving forward the best you can. Everyone makes mistakes. I am bound to make more mistakes, and I wouldn’t expect my life to be exciting if I didn’t. If you took people off the table for a momentary lapse, there would be no one making art.

It’s hard to say which is better, the fact that Kristen Stewart is filed under “momentary lapse” or the fact that Rupert Sanders feels comfortable referring to his work as art. This speech will become the official motto of the movie industry. They’ll swap out the Hollywood sign for “If you took people off the table for a momentary lapse, there would be no one making art.” It’s la lot of landscaping, but worth it. Kristen Stewart will peg Stella Maxwell through the “A” in “art” to silence her doubters and anger her parents. Hollywood is finally self-aware. This is what it looks like. 

_{Photo credit: Splash News}