Courtney Stodden Meets Up With Her Future Self

The difference between you and Courtney Stodden is she maintains a smile nine to five. She doesn’t get paid for her work and she has to wear tight underpants. What’s your excuse?

Stodden met up with Angelique “Frenchy” Morgan so she could pick her brain on how much better shit gets in fifteen years of bottom feeding and double digit plastic surgeries.

Stodden’s wholesale changed strategies on being famous a half dozen times since arriving in Los Angeles with nothing but a pederastic husband and a dream. She tried the underage ingenue thing because she was underaged. She never hit ingenue. For a while she was a cat living in a cage. That’s not metaphorical. She did the body part wardrobe malfunctions for all the major kids holidays. Bulked up her breasts to enormous size and talked about fucking on camera. She lit her hair on fire and tripped over a sprinkler head and live miscarried her baby on social media. At one point she created a scandal where her born again mom wanted to fuck her husband who was older than the both of them. And most apocalyptic of all, music videos.

You have to feel mostly for Doug Hutchison. Dude merely wanted to fuck an underaged girl he catfished online. His intentions were pure, even if illegal in most states. He ripped open Pandora’s Box. That is a metaphor. This one contained Futility, Desperation, and Cameltoes. You have to mourn the what-might-have-been with every Beauty School dropout. In this case, there’s a pole without stripper in Tacoma. Pour out some Rolling Rock for the dead and gone.

_{Photo Credit: Fame Flynet}