Jesse James Moving On

You’ve got to love the guy who fucks you over in a business deal and then consoles you with a platitude such as ‘life isn’t fair.’ True, but it would be more fair if someone randomly stabbed you in the subway. It’s no surprise if you name your kid after a murderer that they turn out to lack empathy. Jesse James recently matter of factly noted he fucked around on his then wife, Sandra Bullock. In his mind it’s something that just happens, like seasonal allergies or accidentally watching his show on a Saturday afternoon: 

“Yeah, I did cheat on my wife, yeah, I stood up and took accountability for it and apologized. And that’s end of story… The easy [put-down] is like, ‘Oh well, you cheated on Sandra Bullock.’ That’s the world’s easiest comeback. In general, both women and men cheat. It’s part of life.”

Not always. It also lessens the odds if you put in minimal effort to not do it. Human beings have the ability to exercise free will. Like not proposing marriage when your dick tells you it still wants to fuck anything with a pulse. Not to sound like a chick, but yeah. You weren’t a poor girl without a roof over her head. You had options. James reportedly cheated on reality show body artist Kat Von D with nineteen women. That’s not a crime of passion, that’s a separate cell phone and a detailed diary. The arrogance is so pronounced as to be worthy of respect.

Women love assholes. They know for a fact that this guy is no good, and it completes them. At least enough to have their first real cum since college drama. The world would be a better place without Jesse James, but you have to factor in the collective positive energy he’s putting out there by making insecure cougars moisten their bedsheets. If you catch him in your neighborhood, shoot on sight and file for divorce. Neither of those two will stop him, but your conscience can know you did what you could.

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