Trump Assassination Foiled By Twitter (VIDEO)

Some guy named Dominic Puopolo tweeted a video in which he said he was going to travel to the inauguration and kill Donald Trump. At least somebody’s excited to actually be attending. Puopolo claimed to be Jesus Christ and that he was simply following orders from God, and dared the Secret Service to stop him. They promptly arrested him while eating at a Subway, further proof that he’s insane.

Puopolo also appears to be drunk, which means it’s possible he was just venting and in a moment of horrible judgement completely fucked his life up on Twitter. Join the club. He’s being held on a one million dollar bond. We’re all thinking the same thing. Instead of attending a screaming women march on the mall, why don’t you people just raise a million bucks and bail this guy out and tell him God confirmed his original wishes? 

A word of advice, if you’re going to assassinate the President, don’t post it on Twitter first. In fact, just stay off of Twitter, it is exceptionally lame. We’re going to look back on this time in history as a lost of wasted time and missed opportunities. Chin up, Puopolo, you’re still better off than most people eating at Subway. 

_{Photo Credit: Miami Beach PD}