Lady Gaga Ungagged

The NFL picks their Super Bowl halftime musical act by assessing what guys who watch football have absolutely no interest in watching. It’s a blatant play to keep female and kiddy household members at the TV screen when everybody else runs off to take a shit and re-fill their drinks during the extended break. 

After Beyonce’s homage to the Black Lives Matter movement during last year’s Super Bowl, there was a rumor that the NFL was ordering Lady Gaga to cut any political shit from her halftime show this year. That necessarily meant 86-ing anti-Trump pantomimes and pussy grabbing. But the NFL came out to strongly deny any gag order, because they honor free speech, minus every single rule they impose upon their players code of conduct on and off the field.

“The Super Bowl is a time when people really come together. Lady Gaga is focused on putting together an amazing show for fans and we love working with her on it; we aren’t going to be distracted by this.”

That obviously makes no sense. Lady Gaga re-enacting campus date rapes with a frat bro in a Trump wig to appease semi-employed cutting minions doesn’t seem all that unifying. Donald Trump isn’t a rapist. Though there’s a good chance the guy we just saw rip off a forty-yard screen play has forcibly sodomized a half dozen coeds.

There’s always that moment when some pop star like Lady Gaga or Justin Bieber attends a sporting event for promotional purposes and they cut to them on a stadium camera and everybody in attendance boos. Drunk sports bar galoots don’t attend Selena Gomez mall tours and start chesting up teen girls asking them belligerently if they have a problem. Cross demographic streams in entertainment venues at your own peril. Or make an extra forty million in halftime commercial revenue and ignore the shit out of the criticisms. That debate has been settled.