Matt Barnes At It Again

Matt Barnes either choked a woman out or got choked by a guy at an NYC nightclub, depending on which hood rat you believe. According to dubious reports, he also punched another woman and a man, and according to his much better teammate DeMarcus Cousins, Cousins then punched a guy too. Cousins told this to TMZ directly afterwards. Nice move.

Barnes’ representative, who probably always has pit bulls barking in the background on conference calls, explained that Barnes accidentally “butt bumped” a woman in the booth next to his VIP booth, which caused the altercation. Here’s the dirty little secret: All of those booths are VIP booths, so meaning none of them are. You don’t need to be important, just willing to drastically overpay for bottles that whores will deplete while you’re not looking. At least Barnes can afford it. There’s dip shits in there dropping a week’s salary. It’s unclear what a “butt bump” is, but it’s probably slang for forceful hip check. Barnes has been angry ever since Derek Fisher banged his wife. Plenty of eligible brides in the club, and they’ll be there until they move back home. 

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