Lady Gaga Praises Madonna

Madonna won Woman of the Year at the Billboard Women In Music Awards. Not Female Artist of the Year. The greatest living woman. This is curious since she’s obviously solidly below average on many levels. First of all, the best woman in the world isn’t annoying as shit, consistently incoherent and shit faced, does not wear a costume every day, have a fake butt, offer to blow Hillary voters, and doesn’t drive their children away. Sometimes they also write their own music.

Madonna gave a typically not very subtle speech to the crowd of coked up weirdos in charge of anointing the best woman. She’s usually incredibly promiscuous. There’s something inherently sexist going on here, and as we know Madonna’s entire schtick is a female minstrel act: 

“Thank you for acknowledging my ability to continue my career for 34 years in the face of blatant misogyny, sexism, constant bullying and relentless abuse. When I first moved to New York, I was a teenager, it was 1979, and New York was a very scary place. In the first year, I was held up at gunpoint, raped on a rooftop with a knife digging into my throat, and I had my apartment broken into and robbed so many times I just stopped bolting the door.” 

Sounds possible. Also probably made up. Lady Gaga and Madonna don’t get along too well because Lady Gaga is a pretentious New Yorker and Madonna is white trash. She did however make a point to acknowledge how awesome Madonna’s speech was. Her favorite part was probably the part where she claimed to be severely disadvantaged despite being a near billionaire: 

“@Madonna your speech at the Billboard Music Awards was inspiring. You’re so brave & strong. Thanks for being that for us girls we need that.”

Yeah you’ve clearly got it rough. The endless complaining alone seems like a real chore. It should be noted you’re the only gender with their own award show, so you’ve got that going for you. The best part of Madonna’s speech was that she thinks she’s been bullied. Everyone gets bullied. Guys just get over it easier. You’re kind of grasping at straws here. Also, if your apartment is getting robbed continuously you need to buy a better lock. That one’s on you. Please, a little accountability. It’s arguably the crappiest award show. Smile, it’s not that serious. 

_{Photo Credit: Twitter}