Larsa Pippen Knows the Steps

When a professional basketball player prone to fucking around and making babies marries a young model prone to wanting to be famous and on Bravo reality shows, it’s unclear who can own the final blame when everything goes to hell. Probably Scottie Pippen. Getting married and making four kids with a young Lebanese-American model remains optional.

If you happen to read my book, Man Rules, you’ll note a specific prohibition against dating any chick who even mentions how her life would make a great reality show. Talk about an obvious fucking sign of danger ahead. She’s hot and she’s been wanted by one man or another since she was nine. This will quickly become your problem.

Some men never learn. Hence the punishment of having a wife who’s good friends with Kim Kardashian and maybe stepped out and fucked the rapper Future, you know, like her good friend did. Now she’s calling the cops to get your intimidations on public record. Larsa Pippen has called 9-1-1 on Scottie Pippen twice now this month. The first time she claimed he was being verbally aggressive. The second time he was breaking shit. You don’t want to wait for the third time when he takes back the Benz S-class he got you for your last birthday.

Larsa Pippen probably fucked Future. You used to be Future. You certainly have shitty judgement. You enjoyed fucking this opportunistic young chick and taking her around on your arm. Now comes the bill. PayPal high seven figures and try to pretend this isn’t extremely damaging to your children. She won’t be hard to replace.