Hillary Clinton A Dick To Security

Hillary Clinton really wants to be the next President and so does a vast majority of the national news media. Perhaps that’s why they’ve donated so heavily to her campaign and brushed most of her deplorable behavior and frightening facial expressions to the side. A while back she promised a group of Wall Street bankers that she wouldn’t legalize pot. The subject was never broached in the debates just like the news made a pinky swear with each other not to mention the book Crisis of Character just because. This is business.

Clearly Clinton’s a deeply scarred person you’d want to personally avoid. You can tell a lot about someone by how they treat their waitress. Clinton doesn’t know what that is, but according to some newly released FBI documents her security detail while she was Secretary of State hated her. According to an anonymous guy this extended so deeply that they thought it was hilarious when she fell and broke her arm. Clearly there were some Humpty Dumpty jokes over hookers and heroin. You might think this anonymous source was made up, but that’s way too funny for the hacky scrubs at the New York Post to think up: 

“When I first met her, we were given specific instructions: don’t look at her, don’t look at her general direction and if you need to talk to her, keep it short and stay out of her way.”

Were those instructions or just basic human instinct? Hillary is the only first lady in modern history who women didn’t want to name their daughter after. Because she’s fucking creepy and weird. If you’ve been intent on voting for her because she has a vagina throughout this process you’re a simpleton. Put a curtain over it and tell me if she’s on the left or right. Congratulations you’re now in bed with the people you hate. Enjoy the feel good moment shit’s going to get scary. Actually just ignore the news, you clearly do that anyway. 

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