Spencer Pratt Jiu-Jitsu Beast

There aren’t many serious douchebags who ever turn things around. It’s worth noting so that you can wait pointlessly for every other asshole you know to someday be your best friend.

Spencer Pratt spent most of the previous decade as the butt of many deserved jokes. Whether or not he was playing the part of the toe-head tool for fame beyond The Hills, his part was that of a guy you wanted to punch ever so badly in the face. He married that Barbie Doll chick and ebbed slowly out of reality life by doing successively lower rated shows until poof. Gone. His last appearance on I’m a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here left everybody ridiculing his claims about traning toward a black belt in Jiu Jitsu. Only, he actually was.

Completely on the stealth this insane moron became skilled in Jiu Jitsu, such that this past weekend he won the Gold Medal at the Jiu Jitsu Federation’s Abu Dhabi Grand Slam tournament at the Los Angeles Convention Center. He’s in the Purple Belt category. I don’t know what means in terms of elite level martial arts performances, but let’s just say it’s far more than I accomplished over the Labor Day weekend.

Pratt also returned to USC where he finished up his last two years of college to earn his degree. He’s drastically limited his public appearances and his Snapchats are primarily self-aware satires on how boring his life is. No shots of his wife’s ginormous tits in the least. He seems square.

Saying nice things about people doesn’t become me, but Spencer Pratt seems like the rare 20-something jackass who became a 30-something alright dude. There’s got to be another shoe ready to drop. A celebrity Octagon battle with a Teen Mom or some shit. This optimistic turn may split the universe. 

_{Photo credit: UAE Jiu Jitsu / FameFlynet}