Peter Thiel No Longer on a Roll

Gay vigilante billionaire Peter Thiel was racking up wins. He bankrolled the Hulk Hogan campaign that killed Gawker, revenge for outing Thiel a decade earlier. He was the lone Silicon Valley CEO to come out for Trump and scored an awkward but prominent prime time speaking spot at the Republican National Convention. Everything was dandy until the Obama Administration put the full force of the Labor Department on his ass for not hiring enough Asian programmers.

Thiel’s Palantir venture currently hires 44% Asian programmers. Apparently that’s not the apt unspoken quota because 80% of the applicant pool is Asian. An alarming stat. That’s a shitload of Asians. Not everybody is settling for esteem awards in basic algebra in the eleventh grade. The Chinese are coming! Just kidding. Too late.

If the Obama Administration’s discrimination lawsuit is successful, Thiel will be denied all government contracts effectively killing his company. Not such a horrible thing practically speaking as his company collects highly targeted consumer data and builds profiles it turns over to the NSA, but philosophically the government is not supposed to vendetta destroy companies and their owners. At least nothing more than hyper-aggressive auditing. 

The Federal lawsuit could be entirely a coincidence. In fact, the Labor Department is insisting it’s all random. Coincidences are an important option to make available to people who don’t think profoundly. The same way Hooters offers a raw vegetable platter. It’s a test. Check Pacific Islander next time they make you fill out a box. Sadly, nobody cries for the Tongans.