Jared Suing from Prison

Former Subway spokesman and child porn exec producer Jared Fogle is suing the parents of one of his kiddy cinema victims. To be fair, she’s suing him first, necessitating him suing her parents. It makes sense if you’re in Federal prison for fifteen years for using your charitable diet sandwich foundation to videotape children being molested.

As a part of Fogle’s original plea deal, he settled with each of the named victims of he and his buddy’s film career in the amount of $100,000 per child. One of the victims, now adult aged, is suing Fogle for an additional amount claiming lost wages since her drug abuse, suicidal tendencies, and emotionally fucked up state prevents her from working. Fogle is counter-suing her parents claiming they’re super shitty parents who yelled and fought with each other often and that’s what made their daughter so fucked up. As opposed to the child rape on the Handycam during Fogle Foundation sleepovers. Somebody’s been hitting the hoosegow law library pretty hard looking for an out.

A number of inmates with a shit ton of time on their hands deputize themselves attorneys and file tons of shit from prison because the cable TV choices suck and if you’re half good at it, the big scary dudes won’t hurt you thinking you might be able to help them with your lawyering. Others like Fogle come from some amount of stashed Subway money and can hire out. It’s a hobby to pass the time. Certainly he can probably mount some witnesses in his case to his child victim having a crappy mom and dad and make this thing a pastime for the next seven years. He’s not going anywhere.

_{Photo credit: Splash News}