Hermione Needs New Metaphors (VIDEO)

To her credit, Emma Watson has dug deeper than most celebrities in the role of UN Goodwill Ambassador for something contrived by men who keep the New York brothels humming. Watson’s HeforShe campaigns have changed the lives of many millions of people once they’re reminded about its existence. This week she announced the launch of the HeforShe Arts Week. The name says it all. Though a three-color brochure wouldn’t hurt for more details on how U.S. tax dollars are being spent.

Not that women aren’t roundly beaten and enslaved and raped and made to wear wretched accessories in tons of nations around the world. Just not in the nations that attend the UN galas or watch Emma Watson new narrated women’s equality film short, Hurdles.

Olympic race hurdles symbolize hurdles faced by women in gaining equality with the good parts about being a man. Nobody wants that fifty years of nine-to-five grind, prostate cancer, and premature death so much. More about being able to wear lab coats and designer eyewear and skipping mascara on days you just don’t feel like it. Like men.

Watson’s video explains all the amazing accomplishments that have occurred in gender equality in the past fifty years. Because women are afraid to be happy, she winds up with all the hurdles still left to be overcome. Which is confusing, because the female Olympians all cleared the last hurdle. Maybe it’s the heptathlon, where women are only allowed seventy percent of the events as men. 

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