Adrian Grenier Righteous Douche

Adrien Grenier is one of the few Adrien Grenier fans left. Maybe a few guys from SUNY Plattsburgh but the number is dwindling as it becomes more and more apparent he bases his acting style on watching iguanas interact inside of a terrarium. He did an interview with New York Magazine and tried to come off as deep but really just sounded like an annoying guy you buy weed from. His new thing is that he’s against drinking straws. He’s sponsoring some stupid ass art exhibit about the whales using the hashtag #strawless. During the interview he ordered a drink and specified that he didn’t want a straw. It seems he’s encouraging us to think about the little things in life. Such as how awesome it would be to trip Adrian Grenier when nobody was looking:

“We consume 500 million straws each day. The equivalent of 127 school buses filled with straws. It’s disgusting. There should be children in those school buses, going to school, to learn, not straws.”

Wow, that’s a lot of straws. How many school buses of paper cups would that be? You’ve been in a lot of movies right, what do they use for coffee cups on set? Yeah fuck it who cares. Don’t bite the hand that feeds you. He also dropped this nugget, apparently without irony:

“I pioneered Williamsburg. It got so gentrified I had to come to Bushwick” 

You haven’t pioneered shit outside of large eyebrows and apparently a clause which states you can’t get fired no matter how much your acting blows. Guys like this make you want to risk prison time. Pay attention Bushwick. The whales are dying but stupid hipsters are thriving. Time to thin the herd. 

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