Petition To Stop Film Critics from Being Critical To Suicide Squad

Change.org is the limp pale dick at the BBC party that is the Internet. If anybody tells you they signed a Change.org petition, look at them as if they just announced they stuck their finger up their ass to determine their colon health. Fans of the Suicide Squad comic created a petition to shut down Rotten Tomatoes for giving the film version of their favorite comic a shitty rating. The petition adds that movie critics who comprise the Rotten Tomatoes scoring system unfairly and harshly grade DC universe movies in comparison to Marvel. The petitioners can’t shut down the sites for each individual movie reviewer so mostly they just want the critics burned alive in their safe space while they yell ‘Haterade’.

The impotent Change.org declaration doesn’t allude to the reason why there might be a Marvel-DC discrepancy, but Disney ownership of media outlets is at least worth a gander. The 1940’s Paramount Consent Decree forced movie studios and distributors from also owning the means of movie production. Monopoly games don’t have to last for forever. You don’t need to be the conspiratorial type to realize the number of major media outlets are dramatically shrinking and fewer and fewer ownership groups are controlling increasingly large chunks of the news media and entertainment. Disney is super fucking big. Though Time Warner is no slouch. Avengers films do seem to be gifted nice reviews.

Rotten Tomatoes is an aggregator whose scores are mistakenly perceived as a movie review grade. In reality, it’s some dude reading through tons of reviews and giving a statistical accounting of the generally positive reviews versus those generally negative. A two-and-a-half star movie under the four star system could easily get a 90+% rating on Rotten Tomatoes if the collective all kind of sort of like it a little. That’s how I got sucked into watching Gay Sulu.

Star Trek opened with a near 90% score. while the individual movie reviews almost entirely noted that the movie was okay, but certainly not a strong film. Critics preference for a certain director, a particular subject matter, or even some level of politically correct messaging could easily tip a Tomatoes score from a 40 to an 80 without any relationship to the actual quality of the film. Thereby, Rotten Tomatoes is largely useless.

Grownups who came up before the digital content curation era understand that you find a couple or three movie critics who you find worthwhile and you read their reviews. Or just announce that any film with a gay helmsman of a starship gets your money. Or sign a Change.org petition to express your emotional displeasure at not receiving societal approval for your specific personal preferences. Margot Robbie doesn’t show her tits at all in Suicide Squad. Way to bury the lede, everybody.

_{Photo Credit: Splash}