Chrissy Teigen Have Tits Will Travel

Five weeks after giving birth to her sperm dynamically centrifuged daughter, Chrissy Teigen is back to her normal routine of wearing low cut tops, posting rants on Twitter, and pretending she’s as pretty as other swimsuit models. Teigen took shit for having evenings out on the town with her husband without their infant daughter. John Legend demanded that if people were going to ‘mommy shame’ his wife, they shame him as well since that’s only fair. Though not nearly as fun because he sings a shit ton of civil rights song.

Funny there’s no dad-shaming. When both of us go out to dinner, shame both of us so Chrissy doesn’t have to take it all. We’ll split it.

Gender equality can mean even more pussy if you just frame it right. 

Nobody was really buying Legend’s take on needing evenings away from the baby since most people can’t afford to do so and never see the light of a decent restaurant until their kids are eighteen and off to do drugs without being watchdogged. Legend put everybody at ease by reminding them that rich celebrity babies are cared for by nurses and nannies so asking the parents to stay home at night is like asking the police commissioner to never leave the office so long as cops are out on patrol. There are layers of management and organization for precisely this reason. Those braless tits aren’t heating up Chunky for John’s supper. 

_{Photo Credit: FameFlynet/Splash}