The Bachelor Doubles Up

This season’s Bachelor, Ben Higgins, shocked the entire mallowmars consuming world by saying “I love you” to two of the final three girls. There’s an unwritten rule in the scripted-reality lore of the show that says the Bachelor cannot tell any of the female contestants that he loves her. Presumably because of feelings stuff. Also, his boyfriend gets very jealous and tears up the green room.

Higgins defended his actions by saying no one ever told him that he couldn’t. Which is a solid argument practically speaking but puts the entire story line as written up by the non-union pale fat dudes on staff into jeopardy. This is reality, so you’re only allowed to be coached, but if you’re s running back who keeps missing his blocking assignment, you will be cut. Turn off the waterfall. Higgins fucked up the day again.

Photo credit: The Bachelor / Instagram