Pam Anderson Misses School

Pamela Anderson recently lamented the loss of the Playboy mystique. Between the magazine transitioning to PG-rated listicles and the Mansion going on the market, the Playboy that she once knew has passed. Anderson referred to her time at the Playboy Mansion as her education saying, “The Playboy Mansion was my university.” If you define university as involving copious amounts of booze, young girls in pasties, projectile vomit, Rohypnol, and rape, as you should, then Anderson has a point.

Now that Anderson is old and no one obsesses over fucking her anymore, she’s employing the menopausal porn star’s favorite cliche: I’m just focusing on being a good parent. She said of her and ex-husband, Tommy Lee,

“We’re actually very good at co-parenting and we’re strict with our children and we want them to be well-educated. You should see Tommy in some of these university meetings. Its pretty funny to see him insist on all of this education.”

All of this education. Sounds like a line from Sarah Palin’s playbook. Too bad Playboy U shut its doors. Anderson’s kids are legacies and would’ve gotten a full ride. Many full rides. In defense of Anderson’s alma mater, anyone who’s watched her sex tape knows that someone taught her well.

Photo credit: Pamela Anderson / Instagram