Microsoft Feels Shitty About Hiring Schoolgirl Dancers

The entire body Microsoft erupted with inclusiveness platitudes after a female game developer at an Xbox sponsored event took issue with dancing schoolgirls working the party. Dancing girls at industry events are clearly at the heart of misogyny in the video game culture. A blow to progressive sensibilities after a few hours on Grand Theft Auto and BlackOps killing and fucking and kicking dogs to death.

The head of Xbox consumed four 5-hour energies to give him the wherewithal to begin firing off internal emails to Microsoft staff that he immediately shared publicly because this sexist holocaust demanded such breach of protocol:

It’s unfortunate that such events could take place in a week where we worked so hard to engage the many different gaming communities in the exact opposite way. I am personally committed to ensuring that diversity and inclusion is central to our everyday business and our core values as a team – inside and outside the company. We need to hold ourselves to higher standards and we will do better in the future.

I’m guessing everybody at Xbox who received the email made the stroking my cock hand gesture. Even the chicks. They all know this is for show. Just like the schoolgirls were supposed to be to impress the nerds at the conference. Kathleen Hogan, EVP of Human Resources for Microsoft and one awesomely fun gal chimed in:

This is unacceptable in terms of how we treat women and how we represent Microsoft, and it undermines the culture we are working so hard to cultivate – one that is diverse and inclusive and grounded in a growth mindset.

Inclusiveness sure seems super important at Microsoft. Though not inclusive of people who find costumed dancing girls at video game events to be harmless, if not mildly amusing. Someday, not long from now, only two forms of public communication and entertainment will exist. Sanitized generic Pablum censored for any possibility of negative review. And big black cock cuckold wife gang bang porn. There is no LiveJasmin for the middle ground. Goodbye, lightly to moderately offensive grown up behavior.