Jason Sudeikis Played the Shit Out of That Fiddle

Jason Sudeikis ghosted Olivia Wilde after they first met. Sadly, it was the first definition of the slang in the Urban Dictionary, not the far more inventive second:

In order to ghost a girl, you must begin having anal sex with her against a window. After a little while, pull your dick out and allow your waiting friend to insert his. This must be done quickly so that the girl is unaware. Then sneak outside, and suddenly press yourself against the window, making the girl think she is seeing a ghost. Recommended that you do this only if you intend to break up with the girl in the near future.

That would be legendary. This chick was on the O.C. Wait, which buddy do you pick and why are you looking at his cock? Like most awesome sex pranks, once dissected, it’s pretty gay.

Sudeikis moves read like a How To manual on picking up hot chicks who are used to being treated like hot chicks. Everyman Sudeikis got Wilde’s number at an SNL party, then waited a month before contacting her, shitting all over the three-day rule. Wilde couldn’t handle it so she fucked the shit out of him and had a baby. Credit where credit’s due. He’s the poor man’s DiCaprio. You just lot a nod, Valderrama.

Photo credit: Olivia Wilde / Instagram