Helen Mirren Is Wasted (VIDEO)

Helen Mirren taped a Super Bowl ad for Budweiser chiding people to consume less Budweiser. It’s veiled as anti-drunk driving, but reducing drinking is the obvous path to reducing drunk driving so you’re telling people to buy less of your shit for their own good. A number of other beer and liquor companies have similar campaigns dedicated to safe drinking, moderate drinking, thinking before you drink, drinking responsibly, and trying not to beat your gay son while intoxicated.  I think that last one is Genny Light.

The government forces these campaigns which are wholly unnatural and entirely empty. The point of booze is to get lit. Life sucks and you want to get high. Maybe have sex with a girl who doesn’t take amazing care of herself or why else would she let you, grab a slice, and usher in a new day from the depths of your carpet. If you want to drink something yummy, order a fucking milkshake, Grimace. When people say have fun but don’t have too much fun, what they’re really saying is, don’t have any fun at all. Or, occasionally, don’t fuck my daughter I don’t care if you paid for a limo. Unless you live alone in a barren landscape, you shouldn’t drink and drive. Though then it would be amazing. We have harsh laws and penalties for drunk driving and everybody who is going to get it, already gets it. Those that don’t won’t be moved by Helen Mirren. Let’s get back to adverising tits and ass and beer and how they all go together. There’s no other way to sell Budweiser.