50 Cent Wears Bankruptcy Well

Because stupid is something that doesn’t come off in the shower, 50 Cent is being called back to court by a bankruptcy judge because his gratuitous photos of stacks of cash belie his claims of being busted broke and unable to pay his creditors. 50 Cent has been posting social media picks of $100 bills in his refrigerator, on his bed, and strewn across the Motel 6 where he’s on a weekly.

“There’s a purpose of having a bankruptcy process be transparent, and part of that purpose is to inspire confidence in the process. When that process becomes very public, the need for transparency, I believe, is even higher.”– Judge Ann Nevins

In short, even though you probably had to sell the last ten feet of your gold to arrange for this prop cash, you just made me look like a mark. Now, I’m going to fuck you like you fucked Chelsea Handler. Deep and slow while imagining a young Chinese woman whose parents I just murdered.

The rapper mystique is based heavily upon the rags to asshole riches storyline. 50 Cent is tightroping that fine line of pleading poverty for the court and Mayweather for his peeps. He just fell off the tightrope. The cash is a mile wide but an inch deep. Nice Camry. 2007 is fittingly also the year we stopped buying your music.

Photo credit: 50 Cent/Instagram