Selena Gomez Stalks In Lingerie

Somebody in marketing got the bright idea to migrate the Selena Gomez brand into sexual thrill seeker persona. It’s like watching your friend’s kids sister try on heels for the first time. There’s something about a grade schooler homaging 9 1/2 weeks that makes everybody feel like the dad from Seventh Heaven with the only secret Jesus never forgives. Isn’t it enough that she’s a beautiful singer? Sorry, I had to. Not everybody is cut out to be sexy. It’s okay to be cute and Spanish. That’s your hook. Edge up the homeland you’ve never visited accent and adopt some orphans. Sing Christmas songs that are about family and your abuela instead of about wanting to touch yourself. “Uncomfortable” is not the one word answer you want from your Frank Luntz survey respondents.

Photo Credit: Selena Gomez “Hands To Myself”