Kylie Jenner Rolling in the Dough

Kylie Jenner’s Rolls Royce Ghost has caused controversy among people who believe it’s inappropriate for an eighteen year old chick to buy herself a $350,000 car. Her third. It’s easy to decry base capitalism when the whore is outspending the johns. That seems pretty fucking sexist. Kylie Jenner’s new app is printing money from among a young female audience that feminists will someday decry were never encouraged into the mathematical and computing sciences. Somebody has to serve the Bloomin’ Onion. Kylie Jenner’s family is drowning in bullion and new vaginas. There will be plenty of time in the future to make highly publicized charitable donations that never get delivered. This is your time, Kylie. Hit the freeway doing eighty come next rain and don’t wear a seat belt. Turn off the lights at night. You are invincible. You are the Ghost. I did what to your brakes now?

Photo Credit: FameFlynet