Jennifer Lopez A UN Ambassador Also Too

B-list actresses come out with latter day questionable lesbian credentials, the A-listers get United Nations ambassadorships for generally uplifting and vague sounding causes. Jennifer Lopez scored the coveted Advocate for Women and Girls title previously held by nobody since it was made up right before Lopez agreed to show up in a gown at the U.N. forum on gender equality at the Four Seasons.

Jennifer Lopez decided that gender equality is paramount now that she has both a son and a daughter who she wants to grow up to experience equal opportunity with just $150 million trust funds in their pockets. She dreams of a world where her son can cry like a girl without being labeled a gay backup dancer like her boyfriend.

As an artist, I strive to inspire so people can aspire to do bigger and better things with their lives. And for me, women should have all of those opportunities and should aspire to be the president of the United States … it could happen soon!

From your lips to Hillary Clinton’s ears, J-Lo. The singer was inspired by Viola Davis’ Emmy speech promoting the roles of women in entertainment even though it was clearly just about black women and Davis later reiterated that greasy Spics were on their own.

Women can find their voices in smaller ways, too. At her concerts, she [Lopez] particularly enjoys hearing women screaming. She feels as if she is unleashing their power — particularly in cultures where women’s voices are muted.

This is all about the right of women to scream at Jennifer Lopez lip-synching and shaking her ass on stage? Why didn’t you say so. I favor that. I think all men do. Your work here is done, Jennifer. They shall sings songs of you in the halls of Valhalla and wherever U.N. officials are banging whores. The Four Seasons I guess this weekend. Return to your civilian life and make your beautiful music. Your boyfriend gets three more tranny prostitution convictions expunged under diplomatic immunity.

Photo credit: FameFlynet