Sharon Stone Brain Hemorrhage Causes Nudity

Sharon Stone is coming clean about the brain bleed that caused her to lose all her senses and get brand new tits just to restore her speech. Her harrowing medical experience whose medical charts were subsequently shredded and burned and avowed of any existence by the medical community, caused Sharon Stone to realize that she was going to have to restore her career from rock bottom:

I thought, ‘You know what? I got thrown off the bullet train, and now I’m going to have to crawl up a hill of broken glass, get back on the train that’s going a million miles an hour, and work my way from the cattle car up.

That’s dramatic. I’d recommend some clothes before the broken glass crawl. I think your brain might be leaking if you think the bullet train is ever coming to California. I’d need to see your vagina before I can give a complete diagnosis. As a preliminary forecast, I’d recommend fucking grandma in the dark.

Photo Credit: Harper’s Bazaar