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March 11, 2015 | celebrity | matt-ralston | 0 Comments
Thaddeus Kalinoski had all but given up on life. He got fat, stopped shaving, then he realized people thought it was hilarious he looked like Zach Galifianakis in The Hangover, who bears a striking resemblance to every other character Galifianakis has played. At this point Kalinoski moved to Atlantic City and became a professional ‘Alan’ from The Hangover impersonator which earned him dozens of crinkly dollars. Then he went to Vegas and had a transcendent experience which is a given any time you leave New Jersey. He now poses for pictures and does public appearances and claims to be making over $250,000 a year getting shit faced on the Strip and has undoubtably claimed some third rate pussy. Look for the tax board to immediately put his nuts in a vice grip.
As far as I know there are no more Hangover films in the works but Kalinoski can probably coast for a few more years and build up war chest for an inevitable extended rehab stay. Sometimes you find Fate, sometimes Fate finds you. Though usually neither happen and fat unkempt sullen dudes usually end up run over by city buses and cremated in batches. That’s one to grow on.
Photo Credit: Facebook