Zendaya Goes Race Card on Anorexic E! Host

Dancing Sinbad skeleton Guiliana Rancic made the mistake of reading a line about Zendaya Coleman’s fake Oscar dreadlocks looking like they ‘smell like patchouli oil and weed’. Sound the claxons of intolerance. Zendaya Coleman is half black, which makes her half more black than any other Disney actress ever. Her voice carries some weight in the stage kid thespian community. She fired back with some largely irrelevant commentary on racism:

There is a fine line between what is funny and disrespectful. Someone said something about my hair at the Oscars that left me in awe. I was hit with ignorant slurs and pure disrespect. To say that an 18-year-old young woman with locs must smell of patchouli oil or ‘weed’ is not only a large stereotype but outrageously offensive. I don’t usually feel the need to respond to negative things, but certain remarks cannot go unchecked. There is already harsh criticism of African-American hair in society without the help of ignorant people who choose to judge others based on the curl of their hair.

Easy there, Dr. King Jr. Jr. I know you went to the Selma premiere. The entire point of the cackling hens on the Fashion Police is to be disrespectful. You could shoot up their offices I suppose. They’re no Charlie Hebdo. Nobody will march. I actually thought they canceled that show after Joan Rivers was put down in her sleep by the comedy elves.

Guliana Rancic was forced to exert the 50 calories available to her each day to actively respond:

I don’t even know what that means, but I’m obliged to believe her. All caps and three exclamation points don’t lie. Giuliana Rancic is no racist. At least not as bad as the Oscar producers who order their cameras to focus in on the five black people in the audience any time something race related is mentioned on the broadcast. Oh, hey, black guy, what’s your reaction? Everybody just needs to simmer down. And stop wearing hair extensions that look like licorice. It’s making me hungry.