Warren Sapp Not Fit To Sell Crap

Warren Sapp’s haggling with hookers cost him his job on the NFL Network and now a series of endorsement deals, the latest being Zyppah, a piece of rubber with a hole in it that you wedge into your mouth at night to keep you from snoring. Rest assured this product is bullshit because if it worked snoring wouldn’t exist. I’m not an expert but putting an oblong and obtrusive object in your mouth can’t be good for your airways or sex life. What happened to personal freedom? A dude can’t get sucked off in a Radisson anymore without his car being repoed. That’s not what this country was founded on. In fact loose women were a part of our delicate framework. Now Zyppah will have to find another fat dude with zero integrity and a clean record. Artie Lange is off the list. As is most any guy with any self worth. Get Rebel Wilson’s people on the phone stat. People are snoring again.

Photo Credit: Zyppah.com