Sony’s Worst Case Scenario Comes True (VIDEO)

After cowering to pressure and refusing to release The Interview ever, Sony’s beleaguered gin stinking CEO Michael Lynton went on a campaign to explain they’d planned to release the film all along and the major theater chains were to blame. Since that didn’t make much sense even to the people who write for North Korea’s State Run News Agency and Vienna Sausage Factory, the film is mysteriously available for release and will be screened at a hand full of independent theaters on Christmas Day.

Sometimes you reap what you sew. After national audiences see this film and report back that it blows, which seems to be the case according to the trailer, Sony will lose out on the These Colors Don’t Run viewership as well as the market of socially submissive people who go to see any film they overheard their cool friend at work talking about. Look for this film to have a 14% on Rotten Tomatoes by the time you’re opening presents. It’s a dog eat dog world. Shit’s real in the streets. You act like a bitch, someone takes your bankroll. Explain this one to the honchos in Tokyo, Lynton, and they’ll tell you the same thing. Also, you’re fired.